Marriage – Argumentative Essay

Marriage is a social institution under which a man and woman establish their decision to live as husband and wife by legal commitment, religious ceremony, etc. This is the kind of marriage that we are all used to. Nowadays, in reality, there are some people who found love not to someone that are the opposite sex, but to those who are the same sex. A lot of people have been debating about the legality of gay marriage. From relating it to religion and its affect on the traditional family values, there are a lot factors that can make this into a controversy.

Even though gay marriage is still an illegal action in the majority countries there are some factors that should be considered to make it become legal. Opponents of gay marriage claim that homosexuality is a sin in most religion. However, this statement violates the First Amendment of Constitution about the free exercise of religion on a person’s religious views must be protected. Which means that the government cannot make a law that is based on a certain religion rule.

Additionally, the civil marriage and the religion marriage are a total different institution; therefore a law in the government that is based on a religion rule should not be made. Moreover, legalizing gay marriage also consistent with the Equal Right Amendment on the first text about the Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex. Therefore the legalization of gay marriage will make an equal marriage for all in the eye of the government based on those two Amendments.

The other arguments that the opponents mentioned is that the Institution of Marriage will get less respect and the definition will become unclear. They said that the purpose of marriage which is to pro-create, hence the marriage between a man and women is the possible one. However, when we see the divorce rate in America for the past decade, the number is stable at 50% for the first marriage. This gives the impression that even the straight marriages give less respect to the institution it self.

Moreover, if we look into the simple, deeper of marriage it self, marriage is a constitution between two people that are brought together by love. So, love is the basic aspect in this Institution of Marriage. Therefore gay marriage won’t give less respect or make the definition become unclear because basically they already fulfill the ground aspect of marriage, which is love. The final argument from the opponents of gay marriage is that family contains a mother and father.

However, this meaning of family has become biased since in reality there are a lot of other families that doesn’t have a mother and father but we can still call them a family. So basically the meaning of family has changed due to the different things that occur in the reality. For instance, single mother and single father families are a common thing nowadays, with this one parent cover the two different role of two parents. Therefore there is no exception for the gay couple if they want to extend their family.

As long as they will provide their kids with love, support, shelter, and things that the kids will need. Additionally there are a lot of kids that have been waiting to have their own family, so adoption in gay marriage will help both the kids and the gay couple in creating their own family. In conclusion, gay marriage is just like any other marriage with a twist of the same sex between the couple. Therefore the legalization of gay marriage will make an equal marriage for all in the eye of the government based on those two Amendments.

Additionally, gay marriage won’t give less respect or make the definition become unclear because basically they already fulfill the ground aspect of marriage, which is love. Moreover there is no exception for the gay couple if they want to extend their family. As long as they will provide their kids with love, support, shelter, and things that the kids will need because there are a lot of kids that have been waiting to have their own family, so adoption in gay marriage will help both the kids and the gay couple in creating their own family.

Furthermore, in my opinion everyone deserve an equal right to marry someone they love because everyone deserves to be happy. SEKAR RINDANG FASHION MANAGEMENT 1401125124 REFERENCES Dictionary. com 5 December 2011 Messerli, Joe. “Should Same-Sex Marriages be Legalize? ” balancedpolitics. org 19 November 2011. 5 December 2011 Tsivkin, Roman. “Marriage Laws In The USA. ” livestrong. com 8 April 2010. 5 December 2011 Wikipedia. com 5 December 2011 Wikipedia. com 5 December 2011 divorceguide. com 5 December 2011

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Arranged Marriage

AIFAA HUSNA BINTI ASHA’RI 112542 LMT 100 / 44 LECTURER : PUAN ZURAIDAH ABU BAKAR Question 1 (a) If I was Sivasothie, I will object the arranged marriage made by my family because I know that arranged marriage will not last longer even though it was parent choice. There were lack of love and respect between husband and wife when we married with someone which we do not know well. Furthermore, there was also the danger of arranged marriage which the husband will act violent towards his wife and to be worse the wife was too afraid to speak out. In Sivasothie’s situation, her future husband was materialistic.

As he works as a doctor, the value of dowry that he wanted was too high that cannot be afford by Sivasothie, plus he did not wanted to be considerate with her family at all. In this case, it shows that a woman pride was very low because she cannot afford to pay the dowry for the man, just because of the arranged marriage made by their family. Question 1 (b) If I was the American girl, I will have a slow talk with my husband to improve our relationship. Maybe it was hard to have a slow talk as my husband was too cold, but I will try to change and improve the situation to save my marriage or else my relationship with him will become worse.

The love between us is fading and it will die if I do not take any action on it. A marriage with no love was meaningless because we were living with our partner everyday and there will be lack of intimacy. It was okay if our husband was not care about us too much. We do not have to be emotional towards our husband because it will destroy the marriage that we build. Hence, we need to make things better and save the marriage from divorced. Tolerate between each other is important so that our relationship will last longer.

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Xenophon and Aristophanes

In Greek society women had little control over their lives. A husband wanted to be able to control his wife so she would run his household as he saw fit, so she did not damage his reputation, and so he knew the paternity of his children. A husband wanted the girl to be closely controlled by her father before she married for the same reasons. Aristophanes’ comedies and Xenophon’s Oeconomicus contain very different depictions of a Greek citizen woman’s life before she is married and during the time shortly after she is married.

Both the comedies and Oeconomicus examine how girls were educated, how closely guarded they were in their father’s household, and their willingness to deceive their husbands. In Oeconomicus, Xenophon wrote about the ideal girl, but she was exaggerated in the direction of perfection. In the comedies, however, some the female characters were almost the exact opposite of the girl in Oeconomicus.

Even though ideas about how girls were raised and how they behaved after they were married are very different in Oeconomicus and in Aristophanes’ comedies, both sets of ideas get at a husband’s desire for his wife to have been closely controlled by her father, and then by him. Aristophanes and Xenophon illustrate this desire by presenting the ideal characteristics of a wife and the characteristics men fear. They also use exaggeration to make the distinction between the good wife and the undesirable wife even clearer.

Because husbands wanted their wives to be controlled first by their fathers, and then by them, women spent their entire lives under the control of men. There was also a large difference between how closely guarded by her father Ischomachos’s wife was, compared to the girls in the comedies. Girls were not only guarded to keep them from learning too much, but they were also guarded to keep them away from men so they would not have sex with or be raped by them.

Because if a girl was, and after marriage her husband found out, he would be unsure of the paternity of his children. Ischomachos’s wife “had previously lived under diligent supervision in order that she might see and hear as little as possible” (Oeconomicus, VII, 5). She obviously did not leave her house much if her family was making an attempt to have her see and hear as little as possible. Because she was supervised that closely, even if she did leave her house she wouldn’t have had a chance to get into trouble because there would be someone with her or watching her.

In Women at the Thesmophoria, the Kinsman portrayed a female character who was obviously not guarded closely, “I had a boyfriend, who’d deflowered me when I was only seven” (Women at the Thesmophoria, 503). If a man was able to get to the Kinsman’s character when she was only seven she was not being watch closely. Calling the person who deflowered her, her boyfriend, implies that this was not a single instance of negligence on part of her guardian; it implies that she was not being watched closely enough to prevent her boyfriend from continuing to see her.

Ischomachos’s wife reflects the ideal for Greek husbands. Because her father so closely controlled her, she would not have had an opportunity to do anything that would call the paternity of her future husband’s children into question. The Kinsman’s character is a depiction of a girl that shows men’s fears about how their wives might have been raised. She is completely out of the control of her father, so when she marries, her husband will have no idea if she is all ready pregnant.

It is likely that how closely or loosely these characters were guarded is an exaggeration. Although Ischomachos’s wife probably was guarded as closely as possible, her incredible ignorance implies that she was guarded more closely then was achievable. The Kinsman’s character is probably also an exaggeration. Although there probably were some girls who were deflowered when they were very young, it seems unlikely that she would have had a boyfriend at the age of seven.

The exaggeration only makes the ideal of a father’s control more clear. In Ischomachos’s wife’s extreme case there is almost no chance that she was pregnant with another man’s child when she married, but in the case of the Kinsman it would be surprising if she was not all ready pregnant. In order for a husband to be able to control his wife easily and so he would be able to teach her how he wanted her to run his household, girls were supposed to be kept as ignorant as possible before marriage.

Ischomachos’s wife is an example of this ideal. He says that ” [she] had previously lived under diligent supervision in order that she might see and hear as little as possible and ask the fewest questions as possible” (Oeconomicus, VII, 5). In Lysistrata an opposite view of the education of girls is presented. A chorus of women spoke about their experience in several different religious ceremonies and festivals. They use what they learned in the festivals to justify giving the polis advice. We want to start by offering the polis some good advice and rightly, for she raised me in splendid luxury. As soon as I turned seven I was an Arrephoros; then a Grinder; when I was then I shed my saffron robe for the Foundress at the Brauronia. And once, when I was a beautiful girl, I carried the Basket wearing a necklace of dried figs” (Lysistrata, 669). Because they use their experience in religious ceremonies as a qualification, they believe they have learned from these experiences.

The contrast between Oeconomicus and Lysistrata is striking in that Ischomachos’s wife was kept home and an attempt was made to teach her as little as possible, while the girls in the chorus left home for extended periods of time and apparently learned from their experiences. The experience of both Ischomachos’s wife and the chorus girls is an exaggeration of what is possible in reality. Ischomachos seemed to think his wife did not know anything he did not teach her.

When she made a mistake, such as when she cannot find something that Ischomachos asks for, he took full responsibility for it because if he had not taught it to her she could not be expected to know it. “But you are not at fault in this, rather I am, since I handed over these things to you without giving orders as to where each kind of thing should be put so that you would know where to put them and where to find them again” (Oeconomicus, VIII, 2). The list of religious festivals given by the chorus as evidence of their education contains service in five separate religious rites.

This list of religious service is “the most prestigious any Athenian woman could boast” (Lysistrata 669, note 138). Some of the rites were only open to girls from the “noblest Athenian families” (Lysistrata 670, note 139). It seems unlikely that many girls, if any, would have had the experience that the girls in the chorus listed. So the experiences of girls in Lysistrata are exaggerated to make the girls appear more knowledgeable than they probably would be, and in Oeconomicus the girl is more ignorant than seems possible.

The exaggeration illustrates why men wanted ignorant girls. Ischomachos’s wife is incredibly ignorant and is very easy to control. She does exactly what her husband tells her to do, once instructed. This contrasts with the women in Lysistrata who have an unusual amount of experience outside of their homes. The women’s experience, in part, contributed to their attempt to take over the polis. A wife who attempted to deceive her husband was very frightening for Greek men because men spent a great deal of their time away from home.

When a husband was gone, his wife would have the opportunity to do things that would damage his reputation and call the paternity of his children into question. A husband could not really control his wife, if he could not trust that she was doing exactly what she said she was doing. In the Oeconomicus there is an example of a wife deceiving her husband that seems very benign. All Ischomachos’s wife did was put on makeup, but when he sees her with a painted face, he tells her that she should not wear makeup because it is a form of deception. Such deceits may in some way deceive outsiders and go undetected, but when those who are always together try to deceive one another they are necessarily found out” (Oeconomicus X, 8). It seems like he is not just lecturing her about putting on makeup, but also about other kinds of deception. Of course after Ischomachos’s lecture, “she never did anything of that sort again” (Oeconomicus X, 9). The Kinsman’s character not only lied to her husband only three days after they were married, but she lied so she could leave the house to have sex with her boyfriend (Women at the Thesmophoria, 504).

Her actions could damage her husband’s reputation, and would call the paternity of his children into question. Her actions seem to be as bad as possible from the husband’s perspective. These actions are a demonstration of men’s fears about what their wives might do if they were willing and able to deceive their husbands. The Kinsmans’ actions are a stark contrast with Ischomachos’s wife, who after being corrected, never again deceived her husband. Because she was unwilling to deceive her husband, and therefore easy to control, she was an example of the perfect wife.

Although Xenophon and Aristophanes were a part of the same society and wrote about Greek men’s desire for their wives to be closely controlled before and after marriage, they explored this desire in very different ways. Xenophon used it to write a text that gave men advice about what to look for in a perfect wife, and how to treat her after they were married. However, Aristophanes was writing comedies so he exaggerated undesired characteristics to create the worst possible wives for comic effect.

When both Aristophanes and Xenophon’s works are examined to see how a father’s control over his daughter and the characteristics that make it easier for a husband to control his wife are portrayed, it becomes apparent that Aristophanes and Xenophon were writing about the same desire Greek men had for their wives to be controlled – first by their fathers and then by their husbands. This control was meant to ensure a properly run household, an intact reputation, and undisputed paternity. Because of this desire for control, when Greek women came of age, they passed from the control of their fathers to their husbands.

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Curleys Wife Narrative Essay

Exam Practice – C. A. T On Curley’s Wife. In this essay, I will explain the character of Curley’s wife having looked at, we can see John Steinbeck portrays Curley’s wife as being a ‘tart’ but also a nice woman. She is a natural flirt as throughout the novel she continues to talk to all the other men on the farm, but when she dies, we see her as an innocent woman. Steinbeck uses many different techniques to present Curley’s wife such as colour imagery, appearance, metaphors and similes in the early stages of the novel.

The effect of these techniques is that the reader creates a mental image of Curley’s wife even before she even enters the novel. Curley’s wife gives off the impression she is a ‘tart’ and a ‘floozy’ throughout the novel. When readers first read about her, her body language is provocative when she leans against a wall in the barn. “Oh! She put her hands behind e=ger back and leaned against the door frame so her body was thrown forward, you’re the new fellas that just come, ain’t ya? , being the only woman on the farm, this reveals her need to be noticed and admired by the men. She talks very confidently and flirtatiously to George and Lennie even though they have just arrived on the farm and she doesn’t know them. She pretends to be looking for her husband and when told that he is not there Steinbeck writes “If he ain’t, I guess I better look some place else” she said playfully.? This shows her boredom in marriage with Curley and that she just want attention from the men on the farm.

Curley’s Wife is first presented to us through the dialogue of ranch-hand Candy, when he describes her to George. Candy’s opinion is very sexist towards Curley’s wife, you only hear the men’s opinion on Curley’s Wife. He also says “Curley’s married . . . a tart” which shows how Steinbeck wants to present Curley’s wife which is in a very crude manner. He uses expressions such as “she got the eye” and goes on to describe her as looking at other men, before eventually calling her a ‘tart’.

The word “tart” which shows the impression and effect Curley’s wife has on other men on the ranch. Steinbeck wanted to use this effect because he wants to show the reader the immediate impression the men have about Curley’s wife. This further supports my point that Steinbeck presents Curley’s wife in a negative manner. The effect of this is that the reader has judge Curley’s Wife without her speaking in the novel. One the one hand, Steinbeck uses the colour red to describe Curley’s wife which explores ideas of danger, strong and bold.

The quote “ She had full rouged lips.. her fingernails red.. she wore a cotton house dress and red mules of which were little bouquets of red ostrich feathers”. This shows how she makes the effort and dresses to attract sexual attraction from the men on the farm which makes readers think she’s a ‘tart’. On the other hand, Curley’s Wife’s appearance could be seen as naive and youthful desire to be found attractive. Red is bright and has an element of happiness to it. Therefore she might not be wearing the colour red to stand out and to look like a ‘tart’.

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Having a First Year Marriage Baby

A new baby inevitably shifts the balance of your relationship. For some this is a positive shift, but for many others it can bring up a range of challenging issues. A baby changes everything as they say. If a couple has a strong marriage before having children, chances are it will remain as such, if not strengthen due to the bond between the husband and wife who must now parent together. If a couple’s relationship was weak, either they will grow more distant after a baby is thrown into the mix, or once again, the bond of being parents will bring them closer together.

In fact, contrary to the popular belief that having a baby brings couples closer, studies on marriage often show that having children leads to a decrease in marital satisfaction and happiness. One of the negative ways a baby affects marriage is the amount of time and energy she requires from her parents. A parent who cares for this demanding human day and night may have little left to offer his or her spouse. The lack of intimacy that can result and cause resentment on one or both sides can be crippling.

For starters, couples have about one-third the time together as they did before the birth of their child, and they have added financial responsibilities. One thing that will change is your conversations. You will find that you are talking less about current events and more about future events This is certainly not to say that having a child means your marriage is doomed. What it means is you should take the time to care for and nurture your marriage, whether you’re a parent already or soon plan to be.

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Gender and Sexulaity

Jackie Pappas Professor Winchock ENWR 106-AN March 5, 2013 Paper #2 – Middle Draft Gender & Sexuality Our everyday lives are greatly affected by ones gender and sexuality. They shape who we are and define our identities. Society expects a certain gender to behave in a specific way and if this does not happen, one is seen as shameful and wrong, leaving the individual to feel defeated and out of place. In society only a few decades ago, women were meant to be silent and restricted. Men were the superior ones who had a voice. They freely got to do whatever they pleased.

In Julia Avarez’ “Daughter of Invention and Judith Ortiz Cofer’s poem “The Changeling,” women were restricted of their true identities and their voices were silenced by the Ppallogocentric order. As a female in society, one was not permitted to speak freely of her opinions because of men. She must remain silent. It is evident that the narrator, often referred to as Cukita, in “Daughter of Invention” cannot speak what she wants. She reads poems from a book her father bought her written by Walt Whitman. She reads his free words; words he can openly speak. These are words of “a flesh and blood man” (Alvarez 14).

Because Walt Whitman was a man, he could speak and write what he so choose. However, when Cukita “plagiarizes” his words, because she was a woman, she was not “permitted” to read her work at the assembly for which she was writing. When she read her speech to her mother, her mother beamed with pride. It was quite the opposite when she read this speech to her father. He was shocked that his wife would let their daughter read the speech she wrote. “You will permit her to read that? ” (Alvarez 15) Cukita’s father said as if she needed permission to speak what she believes. As your father, I forbid you to say that eh-speech! ” (Alvarez 15). Since he was a man, he had the final say in what his daughter said. He could say whatever he liked but his daughter, because she was a woman, could not. Women were expected to be silent and could only speak in the male voice. We see the silence of a girl in Cofer’s “The Changeling. ” In this poem, the speaker recalls a memory of when she was a young girl. She dressed in her brother’s military clothes which “[molded her] into boy shape” (Cofer 725). Her father found it very amusing. He would listen with a smile” (Cofer 725). She loved dressing up as a boy and pleasing her father because it was the only time he noticed her. The speaker pretended to tell stories of her times in the war as a man and this was the time that her father would pay attention to her. The only time he would listen to her words was when she was speaking in his voice – in a man’s voice. All other times, her words were not important to her father; they did not matter to him because she was not his son, she was his daughter. Females were restricted in what they could say and do.

Women were not allowed to do as they pleased. They were limited not only in what they said but what they could do. In “Daughter of Invention,” Cukita’s mother liked to work on her inventions. “She always invented at night, after settling her house down” (Alvarez 10). The mother could only work on her projects after she had completed her obligations as a woman. It was a woman’s responsibility to take care of the house and keep her husband and family happy; putting her wants and wishes aside until these are taken care of first. Even her inventions were restricted.

She would not invent things that would help the world as a whole but come up with ideas that would only help with your everyday life, particularly for the typical American woman. When discussing her inventions and why they did not help the greater good, “she would have said that was for men to do” (Alvarez 10). This shows that she was not allowed to create what she really wanted to invent. American women were not the only women who were restricted. It was common for women to be restricted all over the world. The narrator, Cukita, talked about the fact that her mother did not want to return home. She did not want to go back to the old country where she was only a wife and a mother” (Alvarez 14). In the Dominican Republic under Trujillo’s rule, women were only expected to be two things: a wife and a mother. They were restricted to being anything but. They did not have permission to explore their interests such as inventing. Women were expected to take care of the house and the family and if they did anything else, saying they’d be in trouble is an understatement. Women were not allowed to be free to be who they are. Women were expected to only take care of the family and the house even if they wanted to do something else.

It is still joked about today all over the Internet that women belong in the kitchen. While it is meant as a harmless joke, it is a reality for others. For example, it was a reality for the speaker in “The Changeling. ” While her father was very amused with his daughter dressing as a man, her mother was not. When it was time for the family to sit down for dinner, the mother “[forbad her] from sitting down with them as a man” (Cofer 725). The mother felt that when her daughter dressed in her brother’s clothes, it was distracting her from being a girl.

She is forced to go back into the closet to change back into her expected outfit. The speaker, who once saw a closet full of adventure, then saw the same closet as a dark space (Cofer 725). When she emerged from the closet, back into reality, she walked back into “the real world of her [mother’s] kitchen” (Cofer 725). For the speaker, a woman belonging in the kitchen was no laughing matter; it was her reality. She longed to be able to do the things a man did but she could not because she was a restricted woman. She wished to have the same power that a man did.

After explaining about how powerless a woman was, it is clear that men were the superior ones. In “Daughter of Invention” after the father disapproved of his daughter’s speech, the mother and daughter felt the need to “rebel” and “join forces” (Alvarez 16) against the father. They knew that he was the man in charge. They could not simply tell him what he was doing was wrong and they certainly could not do it alone. It took two women to stand up to one man and they still lost, the father tearing his daughter’s speech to shreds, tearing her to shreds in turn. As the father, he had the final say on what happened.

After calling her father the hated nickname of their former dictator Trujillo, the narrator ran to her room. Her father “ordered [her] on his authority as [her] father to open that door” (Alvarez 16). Because he was a man, he held the power in the house. He got free reign to tell his daughters and wife what to do and they must obey. In Dominican Republic, men were so superior that giving birth to a daughter was not as great as giving birth to a son. A mother was seen as a failure if she did not give birth to a son. When Cukita and her mother went into the father’s room, “his face rightened as if at long last his wife had delivered a son” (Alvarez 15). Fathers were happier when their wives bore them a son. There were fathers who did not pay attention to their children if they were not a boy. In “The Changeling,” the speaker must “[vie] for [her] father’s attention” (Cofer 725). Because she was not a man, the only way she could get her father to notice her was to dress, speak, and act like the son he always wanted her to be. After he mother made her change back into the girl she was supposed to be, she “return[ed] invisible” (Cofer 725).

Since she was no longer dressed as the superior man her father so wanted her to be, he did not pay any mind to her and she felt as if she was no one; as if she was invisible. It is because of her gender that she did not fit into society. Gender plays a major role in our everyday lives. Men and women were expected to act in a specific manner or otherwise they end up defeated. Women were meant to keep their thoughts and opinions silent. They were also not allowed to act as freely as they would like. Women were restricted in what they said and did.

Because women were so repressed, it was evident that men were the superior ones. In modern society, women have earned the right to be treated as equally and as fairly as men. However, there are still some areas in society where women are more oppressed than men are. Works Cited Alvarez, Julia. “Daughter of Invention. ” Approaching Literature. Eds. Peter Schakel and Jack Ridl. Boston: Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2012. 10-19. Cofer, Judith Ortiz. “The Changeling. ” Approaching Literature. Eds. Peter Schakel and Jack Ridl. Boston: Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2012. 725.

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Should Men Be Allowed to Have More Than One Wife?

Argumentative Essay “Man fi have, nuff gal and gal ina bungle, gal from Rema and gal from Jungle…” Is a popular song by Jamaican reggae artiste Beenie Man. The song suggests that men should have multiple partners, a belief to which many Jamaican men also subscribe. A man having more than one wife is called Polygyny a form of polygamy that has been much debated in a lot of countries for years. Polygyny although illegal in Jamaica, remains acceptable in many cultures who argues that it should be practiced here.

However, Men should not be allowed to have more than one wife in Jamaica as this would cause our morals and values to deteriorate and contribute to more troubled marriages which will have a negative impact on the children produced by these marriages. Polygyny is a form of polygamy in which a man has more than one wife (oxford dictionary); helps in the deterioration of moral beliefs and values which will affect our structured system negatively.

Polygyny is In a highly Christian based country such as Jamaica men being allowed to have more than one wife will significantly fail from uplifting our moral beliefs of a stable family unit of one man, one woman and children. According to the BOHRD (2011), Christianity contributes to more than half the religious population. This religious group firmly believes that Polygyny should not be practiced and a marriage is the union between one man and one woman in which we as a country has adopted.

To start allowing men to be able to have more than one wife will only deteriote our moral standards and belisfs. in almost every country where polygamy is practiced it is only polygyny which is allowed and women marrying more than one man are forbidden. Right there is a violation gender inequality as enshrined in (OECD. 2010) a . This act will promote a hypocritical and biased society when it comes to issues of men vs women and hence will promote the abuse of our women. Polygamy also caused many problems within the home between the two wives.

Usually there is at least one wife who is not happy with the arrangement. This is because the new wife is usually younger and has more to offer than the first wife. This jealousy causes a lot of friction in polygamist marriages. If the man buys something for one wife he needs to get something for the other. Even with buying something for both wives one of them often claims that the other received something better. The same thing is true for what he buys for each of their children. This impossibility of satisfying multiple wives at the same time causes many conflicts in polygamist marriages.

The results of these conflicts are anywhere from the mistreatment of the others children to trying to convince her husband to divorce the other wife. This is so common that in Eastern Africa if two wives of the same man get along together people say that he must have used magic on them to accomplish this. Do you see a man having multiple wives to be any particular benefit to females, or is the benefit largely to the male “husband? ” And in this economy, many men cannot afford to maintain one household and family, let alone two or three equally for each wife.

How can broke men aspire to be polygynous when they do not have the wealth to meet the standards of such a situation? Children from such families can no longer earn good education; for there is little to go round among three-four households. They can not afford a balanced meal; being subsistence farmers, who relay on the bounty of the land, when drought heats, they will have to go without food if they don’t get from charitable people who are also short. Women turn to have less self esteem, they see themselves through the male’s eyes. hen a woman stands by the mirror instead of seeing herself through her own imagination, she thinks of how he will see her, so she is using his imagination, to define herself-worthy. In my opinion, polygamy served its purpose in those times, but now, it has become the decadence of the family community, and society at large, destroying self-esteem in women, and bringing unmeasurable suffering on children born from such families. There are reports of happy families but these are few and they could be in denial of reality, one would suggest.

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