Parenting

AN ISSUE OF LOCAL CONCERN – PARENT CHILD RELATIONSHIP In life, it is a reality that we become what we have been involved with and taught since we were born. The environment we live is crucial to the way our way of thinking will develop, and therefore, it will have a great impact on our actions and decisions. Parents play an important role in our lives as our examples and models. Parents and their children hold a special relationship with each other. The kind of parent-child relationship has a huge effect on the way that the child will turn out.

Parenting requires a great deal of adaptation. The parents want to develop a strong bond with their child but they also want to maintain a healthy marital relationship and adult friendships. The major cause of problems in relationship between parents and children is the generation gap. Nowadays, parents try to force the children into disciplined life. For instance, they ask the children to shut their mouth when they are expressing the views about some family issue while trying to manipulate their decisions.

Due to this children don’t open up to their parents and this leads them to be suspicious of their children. When parents are in the pursuit to discover exactly what is going on, the children tend to lose trust in their parents, feeling that their parents are always trying to catch them doing something wrong. Parents, on the other hand, are more experienced in dealing with life’s problems. They try to protect their children from the problems they had to face when they were young. They try different means to do this and these means have a great impact on the parent child relationship.

If the parent frequently uses punishments instead confrontations, the mental state of the child can be spoilt. But if the parent mostly spares the rod also, it spoils the child. There is no perfect way of parenting; it’s more of trial and error. But parents and children can have a very good relationship only when the child as well as the parent makes an effort. Chatting together and going out for a movie or a family picnic once and giving them your presence rather than presents is more effective. As the famous saying goes…. ”Don’t try to perfect your child, try to perfect your relationship”

• Parenting: The process of raising and nurturing children in a family
• Caring: The process of looking after the needs and wellbeing of another person due to their age, illness and/or disability
• Biological parents: The parent who has provided the genetic material, either sperm or ovum, to create a foetus.
• Pregnancy Planned Pregnancy: Planned pregnancies involve a strategic choice on when to parent

There are physical, emotional and economic impacts that result form this decision. A planned pregnancy is generally better for both the parents and child Unplanned Pregnancy:

• May result from poor knowledge about contraception or the fertility cycle or failure with contraception methods
• Become pregnant due to a consequence of tragic circumstances such as rape

Assisted reproductive technologies: In-vitro fertilisation (IVF) and gamete intra-fallopian transfer (GIFT) are examples of assisted reproductive technologies.

This means assistance in terms of expertise and technology is used to aid conception. Social Parents: Many individuals have parenting responsibilities towards a child with whom they do not share a genetic relationship.

Adoption:

Adoption is the process by which legal responsibility of parenting of a child is given to a family or parent other than the biological parent. There are 3 types of adoption:

• The child is already placed with prospective parents, such as a step-parent
• Local adoption & overseas adoption. Adoption of a child with special needs Legal Implications: Adoption Act 2000 (NSW) & Family Law Act 1975 (Commonwealth). All legal rights and responsibilities are transferred from the birth parents to the adoptive parents. The change in parenting is permanent, so the birth parent loses all rights to the child. They may maintain the right to information and contact
• The adoptive parents must be either married or in a de-facto relationship; or the step-parent must have lived with the child for 2 years or more.

Social Implications:

• Society’s changing attitudes has resulted in fewer adoptions, due to greater acceptance of single mothers & the use of the contraceptive pill
• Decision of telling the child that he or she is adopted can be distressing to adoptive parents
• The child must overcome feelings of rejection by birth parents
• Adoptive child verses the biological child acceptance if the parents have other children

Fostering: Fostering provides an alternative living arrangement for children whose parents are temporarily unable to care for them in their family * The caregivers are volunteers who are paid a fortnightly allowance to help them meet the needs of the child * Foster care can range from a few days to a few years and includes: * Temporary care, * Respite care * Pre-adoptive foster care * Long term care * A child must be put into foster care if: * They are considered to be at risk of harm Their basic physical and emotional needs are not being met * There may be risk of abuse or exposure to domestic violence Legal Implications: * Foster care is regulated by legislation, such as Children and Young Persons (Care and Protection) Act 1998 (NSW) * Any person fostering children who is not related to them must have a licence to foster. In NSW a license is issued by the Department of Community Services about various parenting issues * The foster carer make medical decisions or take legal proceedings on behalf of the child Social Implications: Carers must encourage contact with the young persons birth family and accept that he or she will most likely return to their birth family * 30% of foster children have been abused in their biological family * Problems between biological family and the foster child may force the foster family to take a restraining order Step Parenting: * When a man or woman married or forms a de-facto relationship with a partner, who has a child or children from previous relationships, they become a step-parent * New family members need to be accepted, roles and responsibilities must be shared Legal Implications: A step parent has no legal responsibility towards the child * A step-parent who has acted as parent to a child for a long time, and who is now being divorced from the biological parent, may have visitation rights if judge decides that is best for the child’s interests * If a child is adopted by a step parent, rights and inheritance from biological parents are lost Social Implications: Community perception often holds that an intact original nuclear family is superior to any variety of blended family; a stepfamily may be seen as ‘deficient’ form of a nuclear family * Conflict can occur between the child and step parent, primary relationships and responsibilities become a blur * Partners may have different visions of family life and parenting styles that may need to be discussed * Poor relationships with step parents are recognised as a significant factor in causing young people to leave home, with unresolved family issues

Surrogacy: * An arrangement made between a couple who cannot have a baby and a woman who gets pregnant on the couples behalf. The child is handed to the couple after delivery * A woman may need a surrogate If she is: * Infertile * Suffers from a serious medical condition * Uncontrollable diabetes * Cardiomyopathy * Moderate renal failure Surrogacy often means IVF treatment as the surrogate mother may use donor ova or sperm or the partners own egg & sperm * The infertile couple must apply to adopt the child to be listed on the birth certificate as the child’s legal parents * The court must get consent from the surrogate mother to give up parental rights Legal Implications: * Surrogacy is legally a ‘grey’ area in NSW, it is neither prohibited or encouraged * Very specific criteria needs to be established for both parties based on a honour agreement that is not legally binding * Payment cannot be made

Social Implications: * The surrogate mother may have an ongoing attachment to the baby after giving birth * If the surrogate mother goes back on the agreement, there may be great disappointment between the parties * Community accepted may be mixed, as surrogacy isn’t a widely accepted practice * Surrogacy is very costly and may affect the parents economically * Social parents may change their mind and leave the baby with the surrogate mother who may not have the adequate resources or family support Carer Relationships:

Carers are people who look after the needs and wellbeing of another person due to their age, illness and/or disability. Carers may be paid or unpaid. Many circumstances may be planned and lead to a person requiring care, these included: * A planned pregnancy * Adoption or fostering * Grand parenting * Looking after an aged parent Some circumstances may be unplanned and are unexpected and thus afford fewer preparations: * An unplanned pregnancy * Grand parenting * Health problems * Accident * Birth abnormalities When the caring role has been planned, decision-making will most likely be difficult-especially during initial stages * Both planned and unplanned care may require the primary carer to reallocate household roles Voluntary Carers: * Voluntary carers are unpaid, they are regularly family members (parents, partners, siblings, friends or children) * Carers may undertake the caring role for a few hours a week or all day everyday * Some carers are eligible for government benefits * Voluntary carers are often women, with 71% of primary carers & 54% of all carers in Australia being women Paid Carers: Paid carers undertake the role of caring as a form of employment and therefore receive financial payment * Types of paid carers can include: * Family day carer * Nanny * Doctor * Foster carer * Teacher * Nurse * Palliative carer Managing Parenting and Caring Responsibilities: * With effective management strategies, a person is more likely to be able to achieve goals * Physical, social, emotional and economic changes will need to occur during preparations for becoming a parent or carer Physical preparations:

Biological Parenting: * Optimise physical health before conception and during pregnancy * Maintain a healthy, balanced diet and develop awareness of special needs during pregnancy * No use of alcohol or tobacco and other drugs * Participate in regular exercise * Attend regular paternal courses to learn about physical and emotional needs during pregnancy and birth * Attend regular appointments with a general practitioner to monitor the baby’s growth and development and undertake ultra sounds and other tests Social Parenting: The physical preparations for social parenting are often similar to the first 4 points of biological parenting Caring: * Participate in regular exercise to maintain optimum physical & emotional health * Maintain a healthy, balanced diet to ensure physical needs are met as caring can place a strain on wellbeing * Practise safe lifting skills to assist with the mobility needs of the dependent * Practise how to give an injection or use an oxygen mask * Investigate and install physical aids in the home, such as railings and ramps Social preparations:

Biological Parenting: * Attend prenatal classes to meet others in the same situation- these friendships may continue after delivery * Investigate child friendly social activities in the local area * Locate parenting groups in the community * Organise baby free-time with partner Social Parenting: * Develop relationships with other parents, such as through child’s sport and recreational activities * Locate parenting groups in the local community * Arrange child-free time with partner to develop and maintain own relationship Caring: * Enlist the support of family members Identify necessary support groups, such as carers of people with dementia or cancer * Be aware of support groups, that cater for cultural and language differences * Let close friends know about the situation Emotional preparations: Biological Parenting: * Discuss moods and emotions with partner, family & friends * Investigate and practice relationship techniques Social Parenting: * Discuss the concerns, fears and thoughts with the partner and other parents to identify with others and gain insight into possible actions and solutions * Recognise if help is required from a formal or informal support network Caring: Enlist in a support group to deal with varied emotions * Make friends with others in a similar situation-often carers lose touch with family and friends * Grieve for changed personal situation but be aware of potential for depression and sources of help Economic preparations: Biological Parenting: * Plan for financial management; prepare and stick to a budget * Analyse and adjust finances, such as mortgage payments * Investigate maternity and paternity leave and provisions in the workplace * Investigate payments from Centrelink Social Parenting: * These actions are similar to the ones above Caring: Plan for financial management; prepare and stick to a budget * Analyse and adjust finances, such as mortgage payments * Investigate leave provisions in the workplace Factors influencing resource management in the caring relationship: * The values and goals of parents and carers within relationships, such as families, provide the incentive for management and will therefore impact decision-making * Age, skills & capabilities and special needs of the dependent will influence both the resources identified by the parent or the carer and the strategies selected to effectively manage their parenting or caring role Age: The age and maturity of the dependent will determine the level of care required * If a child has a disability or illness, it may not be possible to leave them on their own at any time * An aged person may not require care just because they are elderly Skills & Capabilities: * Once the dependent has developed a variety of personal skills and capabilities, it will be possible for he or she to contribute to the relationship and management resources * Skills may need to be interchanged or substituted

Special Needs: * Special needs can refer to those of the dependent or the carer and can affect what services are needed either temporarily or permanent * Modifications mays be needed for housing in the form of ramps and railings * The parent may have the special needs and the young person is responsible to act as a carer * Services such as Centrelink payments may be required Resources: * The resources that require management and prioritisation most often are time, energy, finance and housing. Access to services such as support networks is vital * Negotiating and using these resources can lead to difficulties in the caring relationship Time: * The personal care of dependents, such as feeding and washing * Developing close relationships * Communicating and sharing activities * Personal pursuits (transporting children to sports training) Energy: * Feeding, changing and playing with infants * Transporting adolescents to leisure activities Shopping and providing house maintenance for an aged parent * Feeding and lifting a child, such as one with a cerebral palsy Finance: * Finance is required to access many other resources required for parenting and caring such as material goods and formal support networks * Circumstances of the dependent relationship will determine the demands on finances Housing: * Suitable housing is required to meet the needs of the dependent and carer * The family home may require modification Other housing choices can include a hostel or nursing home Access to Services: * Educational: schools and pre schools * Health: doctors, hospitals, early childhood centres * Homecare assistance: Meals on Wheels, home care * Recreational: libraries, sporting clubs and dance groups * Financial: Centrelink * Housing: Department of Housing, nursing homes and hostels, Ronald McDonald houses * Transport: community transport, maxi-taxis * Spiritual: church, synagogues, mosques Management strategies: The actions that will assist when the management of a specific situation is required * Strategies may be utilised together to achieve the desired goal: * Management decisions involve the use of resources to achieve goals * The two most important factors that affect decision-making are the values of the family and the resources available to them * Values determine that goals will be set and resources determine how well the goals will be achieved * Management strategies that are a starting point for action as the need to be applied to situations that are in need of managing: * Identifying values Setting and prioritising goals * Establishing standards * Identifying resources and using them wisely * Maintaining a positive attitude * Encouraging cooperation * Aiming to have flexible attitudes when necessary * Sharing role allocation * Having effective time management * Developing sound planning procedures * Establishing routines * Using a problem-solving approach Recognising ‘change’ not whether it is good or bad Parenting and caring relationships: Roles in Parenting and caring: * A variety of people play a role of parenting and caring within society. This role is associated with meeting the needs and wellbeing of the individual in care, as well as modelling behaviour that is acceptable to the wider society. Individuals and groups who adopt roles: Parents: Biological and social parents play an important role, the importance of providing love, support and encouragement as well as providing physical needs * Overtime the parenting role is increasingly shared between parents compared to the past as the female taking responsibility of the care of the child at home * Non- custodial parent: the one who may have the child visit on the weekends and holidays parents (divorced/separated parents)

Grandparents: * Child-rearing: passing on family traditions and culture * Children develop special affection for and interest in their grandparents * Increase emotional wellbeing, self-esteem, self-confidence * Grandparents may meet the needs of family members by assisting in childcare for their grandchildren * Valuable in providing economic, social & emotional support Relatives, including siblings: Members form extended family can provide support to parents by being alternative role models meaning for sporting activities or leisure * Many adolescents take on responsibility for younger siblings baby sitting, transport, cooking Teachers, including childcare staff: * Physical needs providing play activities and encouraging a balanced diet * Intellectual needs teaching skills and knowledge * Social needs providing encouragement and support in learning to work ith others, following school rules and resolving conflict * Cultural needs teaching children about the culture in which the way they live, history & traditions * Emotional needs developing self-esteem of students through recognition and rewards, as well as teaching resilience and coping skills * Spiritual needs some schools a particular faith is taught and students have the opportunity for prayer, worship and fellowship Paid Carers: The most convenient and expensive form of childcare is a nanny, the child can develop a bond with parents are constantly absent * Carers provide assistance to the aged, chronically ill or disabled Homecare helping with cooking and housework Significant others: * Doctor can provide immunisation and treat illnesses within children or assist with mental health issues * Neighbours and friends may provide practical assistance or occasional care for children if parent needs to run an errand * Social workers improve the socio-emotional wellbeing of a child or dependent by explaining the situation.

The assist with the child, dependent, parent or carer to develop strategies to deal with hard situations Significance of gender roles and parenting: * The mothers roles was originally: nurturing and feeding while the father was the provider and the disciplinarian * It has dramatically changed. E. g. fathers can receive paternity leave, to allow the bonding process with his child to begin earlier. Men also participate in more tasks at home to make sure the household functions correctly * Discipline and financial providers are seen as more shared responsibilities in contemporary families

Factors influencing parenting and caring relationships: Age: * Age of parents and carers can influence the relationships developed with those in their care * With age comes experience * Older adults may have carefully planned for parenting to occur at a time when finances and relationships are stable * Size of age gap can influence the relationship when the age gap is smaller, closer relationships can develop Culture and religion: Many people are born into a culture which beliefs and customs are passed from one generation to another * Persons culture can be significant influence on nurturing and the development of parenting and caring relationships as sharing culture and belief can be a source of bonding * In the multicultural society conflict can erupt in relationships when cultural norms are different to one another * Adolescence and early adulthood can be a time when people are searching for identity, with religious exploration being a part of the process * Carers need to respect the religion and values of their dependents observant of their faith Education: * The form of education may very from formal schooling to specific courses offered at TAFE. An educated parent or carer is more likely to be aware of support services available and have the confidence to use them * If a carer is formally qualified or has significant experience in caring, the dependent will usually have a higher quality of care offered Gender: * Because of socialisation, people of different genders behave distinctly and this carries through parenting and caring roles * A child’s concept of ‘female’ and ‘male’ develops from observing parents behaviour * Demonstrating flexibility in household responsibilities linked to gender roles, reflects in less conflict and greater cooperation * Expectations of parents hold for their children will influence their interaction with them and the other gender * In caring professions such as nursing, teaching and social welfare majority are females Previous experience and upbringing: If a person comes from a positive family life and experiences this will be repeated for their own children feel more secure and valued and leading to stronger bonds * Negative experiences may lead the parent to reconsider the values from their own experience and upbringing Socioeconomic Status: * Is influenced by the income received, level of education & the occupation of the parents * Some parents with high incomes are forced to work longer hours with less involvement in their children’s lives * A lower socioeconomic family enjoys low-cost recreational activities, such as bowling or camping opportunities for effective bonding and communication Media: The media pervades all aspects of life in our society, individuals are exposed to behaviours and opinions that are expressed on television, radio & internet * Parenting and caring relationships may emulate interactions in relationships in the media without even realising that they are doing so * Internet websites such as Facebook and MySpace can interrupt with ‘family time’ Style of parenting: Authoritarian: * characterises a demanding and inflexible parent who usually has a preconceived goal to achieve * allow children to put little input into decisions that may affect them * this can result in the child being resentful and distant * ‘My way or the highway’ Democratic: * this style invites all family members to have a say in decisions made * children feel appreciated, especially when their ideas form part of the solution

The purpose of this paper is to express the advantages and disadvantages of single parent homes. As compared to over forty to fifty years ago, single-parent families are common in today’s world. A single parent is a parent with one or more children, who is not living with any of the children’s other parents. The percentage of children who live with two parents has been declining among all racial and ethnic groups throughout the years. It has been found that children in single-parent homes generally fare worse than those in homes with two parents. In today’s single parent households there are many advantages and disadvantages.

Even after you weigh the single parenting pros and cons you will see that the disadvantages of single parenting usually outweigh the advantages. The biggest concerns about single parenting are the children. Single parenting is not an easy thing to do. You must be both mother and father to a child or children. Youth from single mother homes, especially those living in poor communities, are at higher risk for adjustment difficulties (Shook et la, 2010). National estimates from the United States have found that the poverty rate of single parent homes was 43. 5% as compared to 21. % of cohabitating families and 7. 6% for married families.

Single and cohabitating parents also had fewer assets, less stable employment and higher levels of material hardships. Among single parents and never married mothers, they may be even worse off than divorced mothers, because they had lower levels of human capital or family support and were less likely to receive child support (Gibson-Davis and Gassman-Pines, 2010). Research has shown that low income parents were more likely to use harsh discipline, engage in erratic and inconsistent parenting practices, and provide less cognitive stimulation.

Economic well-being has also been directly linked to parental psychological health, because financial strain increases stress, anxiety and depression, further compromising parenting ( Gibson-Davis and Gassman-Pines, 2010). Growing up in a low socioeconomic household increases vulnerability to a wide array of risk factors that can have long-term developmental effects among children (Taylor et la, 2010). Stress and psychological vulnerabilities negatively influence parenting quality through behaviours such as ineffective monitoring of children, harsh or hostile parenting, and inconsistent parenting.

Distressed parents are typically less affectionate and report feeling less capable in disciplinary interactions with their children. These types of poor parenting behaviours predict lower levels of children’s positive social behaviour and higher ratio of behaviour problems. Children from single mother families are at increased risk of maladjustment as a result of exposure to adverse environments resulting from poverty, parental internalizing symptoms and ineffective parenting (Taylor et la, 2010). Children from single parent families have very poor and behavioural outcomes.

The transition to adolescence is a particularly vulnerable time as youth begin to exhibit lower social competence, declines in academic performance and increased levels of delinquency do to the lack of monitoring from their parent. It is proven that children living in single parent homes, in poverty ridden neighbourhoods are more likely to drop out of school, both so they could go and work to help with the household income or do to the lack of interest in academics. Pregnancy rates also increase for children between the ages of 15 to 17 years of age who live in single parent homes.

There are also signs that children who have gone through a divorce may have problems with depression, and emotional stress. It has been found that adolescents from single parent families were found to be three times more likely to be depressed than those living in two parent households. Single-parent homes are also associated with criminal activity, such as murder, rape and other violent crimes. And they are also more likely to use drugs. Problems found in the single parent household may not be because of the parent who raised the child, but can be linked to other things that are also related to single parenting.

The effects of coming from a low income family can include things like lower education levels, lower economic achievement and can result in leaving the child feeling isolated and lonely. It would appear that being a part of a single-parent household indicates a negative family environment. It should be said however that many single parent families find a balance and successfully thrive in today’s world. Single parents often worry that their children will somehow be damaged from living in a single parent family.

While a single parent family may not be the ideal situation for raising children, many two parent families are also less than desirable. Kids can actually benefit from living in a single parent family. A home filled with conflict is the least desirable home environment for children. When the child’s prior two parent household included frequent fighting between the adults the child can benefit from living in one parent home provided that the conflict is stopped. Children observe adult relationships and usually apply what they have learned to their own relationships as adults.

By residing with only one parent, the child may actually have a chance to observe healthier adult relationships. Children learn valuable lessons from dealing with hard times and having a difficult lifestyle from many of their peers. A single parent may actually have more time for the kids that a married parent would have. Since there is no longer a spouse around at mealtime, meals don’t have to be as substantial and can be structural around kid-friendly ingredients. The opportunity to spend time in two separate homes can be a good experience for your children.

They will see different approaches to life and hopefully, take the best of both homes to use in establishing their own households as adults. Kids who live with one parent tend to develop independence faster than their peers. Since the parent will probably have a job and other many other duties, the kids may have to learn to do things for themselves such as preparing a single meal or participating in household chores. The kids also learn that they need to be ready to take care of themselves, since they, too, could end up on their own or in a single parent situation someday.

Another benefit of a single parent household is the child may become extremely close with the parent they live with. Because in some circumstances children only have one parent so the child will want to form a strong bond with the only parent they have. Your kids will have more opportunities to develop responsibility. Although no one wants their kids to grow up before it is time, as part of a single parent family it will be easier for your kids to feel like partners in the family as opposed to “just the kids”.

They will have more opportunities to contribute and grow into responsible adults. The single-parent and the children will learn resiliency. Resiliency, the ability to “bounce back” when negative things happen, is one of the most valuable skills one needs to survive in this world. Facing some of the difficulties of a single parent household, the parent and child will have numerous opportunities to practice resiliency. Face difficult situations with a positive attitude and hope, and learn to look outside the box when seeking solutions.

They will develop a skill that can get them through the toughest of times together. Even though woman face greater financial problems, they tend to be more nurturing to their children by telling them they love them, hugging them, and showing affection towards them. In conclusion it is apparent that single parent households, whether headed by a mother or father, have more to deal with than two parent households. Single-parent households will continue to exist in society.

It is also evident that children in two-parent households generally fare better than children who are raised by only one parent. With single parenthood being such a commonality in today’s world, it is important to take a close look at the research out there regarding this type of family unit and the effects it can have on children. With this knowledge, individuals are better able to address the many challenges accompanying single parenthood. Parenthood is challenging. Single-parenthood is excruciatingly challenging, I know because I am a single parent myself.

Infancy and early childhood are referred to as those immature years of life and the stage at which most of a child’s development occurs. To strengthen the development of a child’s learning one must understand the physical and mental factors that affect a child’s development through observation and interaction. Development begins during the prenatal period on up to the early years and depends on the nutritional, medical, emotional, and intellectual support of parents, family members, caregivers, and teachers (Cherry, 2011).

Parenting styles also play a role in what influences development as well as early childhood education programs. During the prenatal period when a child’s development begins, thus being aware of many factors that can damage the fetus and the development of a healthy child. In the early years the development of physical growth is through constant change. A key component in a child’s development is based on good nutrition as well as motor milestones needed for a child to succeed. Piaget and many other theorists refer to stages of specific age that defines the milestones reached.

However, every child is different and so are there developmental successes (Berger, 2008). Infants develop skills based on their experiences in exploring the world around them. Physical play allows them to develop coordination as well as stronger muscles. Sensory skills are developed through taste, smell, touch, seeing, hearing, and from that perception is gained. Motor, sensory, and perceptual skills are supported by stimulation and a caring environment. Cognitive development occurs when a child becomes aware of physical sensations such as his or her mouth, hands, and feet.

This is when an infant will explore and begin to understand what is around them (Berger, 2008). It is through early childhood that physical and neuropsychological changes help to increase coordination, control, manipulation, and movement through refining motor and perceptual skills. A good example of refining motor skills is through lacing and threading when tying their shoes as well as writing and drawing. It is these changes that create the milestones of such development. Environmental stimulus creates neurological development to control body functions to succeed in sports and other body-related skills.

To enable such development to master such skills one must provide children with the opportunities of a challenging environment to learn and improve on such skills. The importance of childhood development is based on peer relationships, social play, and emotional development that help them build on self and moral values. As children engage in such play, he or she will begin to explore ways to solve problems as well as how they view other’s perspectives (Berger, 2008). It is through a stimulating and supportive environment that will allow a child to develop.

The support of the parents, family members, and other individuals will help a child develop self-concept and self-esteem to learn and grow, and will be the foundation for building strong relationships with the ability to express emotion. Such a foundation will allow a child to develop by exploring new situations and being able to build on that to create healthy relationships (Berger, 2008). Parenting Styles and their Influence Family structure also affects both cognitive and emotional development of a child and is based on the size of the family and what order the child was born.

However, a child’s performance is based on how safe and secure the child feels as well as an environment that provides warmth, consistency, and family communication. Family structure also leads to other factor that influences childhood development and the styles in which parents teach that may or may not be a supportive foundation. A clinical psychologist named Diane Baumrind discovered that there were four styles of parenting; however, three styles were displayed most. Her discovery came from a study that she had conducted on more than 100 children.

This study of parenting and its effects on children displayed many aspects of parenting such as strategies of discipline, parental nurturance, styles of communication, and one’s level maturity and control. Observation from such dimensions created what is known as the four styles of parenting. Authoritarian Parenting Authoritarian parenting was a style of parenting that expected children to follow the rules and obey. Good behavior was rewarded; whereas, bad behavior was punished.

This style of parenting felt as though they needed to give no eason other than “they said so. ” Communication between parent and child was minimal with no response to child. Children who grew up from this type of parenting ranked lower in happiness, social competence, and self-esteem. Children are not allowed to make their own choices and given limited freedom. Authoritative Parenting Authoritative parenting is similar to that of authoritarian in terms of establishing rules and guidelines to follow, but much more democratic. However, this style of parenting is more responsive to their children.

Though standards are set high there is room for decision-making. Parents are more willing to listen to their children and be more supportive rather than punitive. This style of parenting tends to result in happier children. These children tend to achieve higher grades in school, and have less social problems. Authoritative parenting helps children develop self-sufficiency and independence. This is the style of parenting I believe is most effective because it offers the most balanced approach to parenting.

Parents enforce rules and limits, but do so to protect their children rather than stifle them. This style of parenting enforces rules when they need to but also allows their children to make mistakes and learn from them when the situation does not require strong discipline. Permissive Parenting Permissive parenting is what many refer to as understanding parents. They demand less and seldom discipline their children and create substandard assumptions of maturity level and self-control. Baumrind believes that indulgent parents are less demanding and more responsive.

This parenting style would prefer to be a friend rather than a parent and can be a detriment because it teaches the child; rules do not need to be followed; thus, creating defiance of authority without worrying about the consequences of others. Children taught from this style of parenting tend to have low self-esteem, lack of self-control, and do poorly in school. These children will have difficulty in society associating with their peers and creating healthy relationships. Uninvolved parenting Uninvolved parenting ranks lowest of all life domains.

This style of parenting makes few demands and communicates very little with little responsiveness. Uninvolved parents are detached from the lives of their children other than fulfilling basic needs and there are some instances in which the parents even neglect those. These children often feel rejected and lack in self-control, self-esteem, and rank less competent than the rest of their peers (Cherry, 2011). The way our children show respect, obedience, and discipline is created by the style a parent teaches his or her child.

The nurturing support and love we provide is crucial to the development of our children and provide the means of our children being happy and healthy. Those children who learn better probably have a secure family life and supportive environment that will allow mistakes to be made from which children learn from without judgment being passed. By creating such a positive environment our children can explore, and we help to create those positive influences that allow children to succeed. Childhood Education and How it Influences Cognitive Development

Childhood education is those activities and experiences created by educational programs and strategies intended to effect developmental changes in children. However, it begins in the home at an early age. As parents, we begin by being supportive of our child’s abilities while making sure that he or she is making all the necessary connections. Parents should be reading and singing as well as pointing out objects located in one’s environment and developing conversations with our children that builds on vocabulary.

Allowing children to draw or color allows them to be expressive and gain that hand-eye coordination. Childcare givers also increase the benefits of our children’s development with giving them more conversation and interacting with other children. This type of setting allows them to try diverse activities and allows them to visit new places. In doing so, this will help to increase their thinking skills and teach them to follow directions. From this point, our children go into the pre-k programs and kindergarten.

In general, children engage in much pretend play, thus building on cognitive skills by allowing the children to read others intentions, encouraging social interaction and helping them to distinguish between genuine and imaginary. This allows children to take on a social role representing reality through make believe. This stimulates the child’s ability to think for him or herself. Therefore, childhood play contributes to human development and allows the child to express by pretending social roles. Conclusion In conclusion, children continue to grow and learn as they move from infancy to toddler, and to school age.

However, it is not just the physical aspects, but the cognitive aspects of thinking, imaginative play as well as language maturity. A child’s emotional, social, moral, and sexual factors are growing as well. In knowing those factors, one will obtain a better understanding about the importance of family influences, parenting styles, and childhood education. However, to understand these influences are not the only factors in the development of our children. The key is to apply practical everyday knowledge in how we care for our children and what it takes to meet their needs.

In recent year, a book “Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mom” written by Amy Chu have arouse public attention. It evoked general public’s vivid discussion about choose the Chinese or Western parenting way. Tiger Mom is denote to the aggressive moms, albeit originally it referred to Chinese mothers, since those parents succeed in raising extraordinary academic achievers’ children. Tiger mum boost her offspring to be the best. She put all the effort to her son or daughter. Taking Amy Chu as an example, she is a typically “tiger mum”. She has two daughters who both are outstanding at academic and instruments.

Chu (2011) claim that the main reason of her daughters having various achievements as she choosing Chinese parenting ways to raise her offspring. However, Chinese parenting way also exist several drawbacks. A Tiger mum does not equal a better future of child Firstly, the most obvious disadvantage is damaging the child’s self-esteem. In Chinese parenting, parent tends to employ punishment than admiring. For instance, when the children got B at examination, Western family will give the child a lot of encourage and tolerance .

On the other hand, Chinese family will penalize her sons or daughters, as they think the child must not work hard enough. Those parents may shame their child or call them useless or garbage (Chua, 2011). It would directly affect children psychological growth. If children always take punishment without praise or appreciation, they would have low self-esteem. They will not have motivation to improve because their parent have ridiculously high standard. Whenever they do a great job, they also think that is their responsibility. The more conflict and less cohesion in a teen’s family, the more likely they were to have poor mental health. ” (Pappas, 2012, Para 5). Finally, the children not only do not have high achievement but also low self-identification. Secondly, another shortcoming of tiger mum’s parenting way is restricting the teenager own critical thinking and creativity. Those adolescent only follow their parent order and desire from their young generation. Due to the parent ponder the younger are not mature enough to decide a right path (Peg Streep, 2009). Hence, their parents would arrange a very dense schedule for their children to observe.

As time goes by, the juvenile will become as a machine or robot because they do not have critical thinking and creativity in their daily. They are not allow to choose their own choices. Everything must obey by their tiger parents. As a result, their children could not individually determine and propose new ideas. When they growth up, they cannot easily be promoted to higher position as they not well-equipped in this area. Moreover, it is no exaggeration to issue that the adolescent who raising by Chinese parenting is lacking social skills, those adolescent have required fulfilling the schedule designed by their parent’s.

According to Amy Chu (2011), she has very strict parenting to raise her daughter. She does not permit her daughters to have their liberal leisure time to watch television or play computer games, even does not allow them to participate in redundant extracurricular activities instead of playing violin or piano. Her daughter can hardly to meet their friends and play together. Also, she commands her offspring to maintain outstanding academic result. Every test and examination grade is greater than A. Those children do not have any spare time to chat and play with friends.

They cannot practice their social skills such as conversation skills, social perception skills and emotional control skills. It is vital for them to work in the future as it could affect the relationship between you and your supervisor or colleague (Lee, 2000). It is truthfully to say that without social skills would not have a great prospect Tiger mum expect their children to have great academic result to enter famous college. Nevertheless, in Tiger mum parenting way cause the children to become low self-esteem, stereotyped and lack of social skills. In the child grow up period, it is very important for them to cultivate these vital factors.

In current years, Andy Leung, a Chinese University Of Hong Kong master had an outstanding academic result, but he was absolutely failed in his social skill. He also cannot find a job after interview more than 200 times. It proof that Tiger mum’s parenting way does not mean that the children can have brightened future. Parents have responsibilities that are unique to parenthood, providing guidance and discipline for their teenagers. But they also gave a responsibility to respect their teens and treat them as persons having equal human worth and dignity. As the old saying goes that “all children are ifted”, parents should give more support and encourage for their offspring instead of pushing highly expectation on their child. It only makes the case worse and worse. It is a golden opportunity for parents to think twice how to up bring their child is the best. Reference List: “Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mom” ,Amy Chu, Penguin Press, 2011 “Nurturing Success: Successful women of color and their daughters”, Essie E. Lee, 2000 “Mean Mothers”, Peg Streep, 2009 “Study: ‘Tiger Parenting’ Tough on Kids”, Stephanie Pappas, 2012 http://www. livescience. com/18023-tiger-parenting-tough-kids. html